Monday June 30, 2008

omg its been the whole weekend and i have so much to tell lol. well on friday trisha came over. we went to my brothers baseball game and he won. but there was this stupid green shirt lady that wood scream so loud and rosemary said she was going to go punch her in the face. she wood yell at the pitcher 1...2...3... out. it was so annoying. so at the end of the game when my "g" best friend trevor was pitching i wood yell that as loud as i could. he did amazing lol. we won by one point. and now his team is going to the world series, i am so happy. GO BAD BOYZ!!!! they rock lol. i made a new best friend that nite named gabriel. he is pauls little brother and he is so adorable. trisha said i scare little kids and that is how im going to kidnap them when i grow up lol. kinda that is not wat i am going to be lol. the keyboard is all sticky and its bugging me. but yah. then we were driving home and there was this huge car accident and we had to go through the median, i thought my mom was going to kill us lol. but we obviously made it or else i woodnt be typing this right now lol. omg i almost forgot, that day i gave trevor a hug and he just ran away from me. so iwas like trevor why do u hate me so much, im just going to cry myself to sleep so he gave me a high five. and i was like trisha that is the highlight of my day and shes like the highlight of ur day is not me coming over and i was like uh no lol. but yah lol. then on saturday i went to my little brothers baseball game and they lost by one. but they did good. i got a sunburn on my shoulders cuz i was wearing a tank top but it should be turing tan soon... i hope lol. then that nite i went to the dance with smitty and naomi. u were supposed to wear jeans but we just happened to wear skirts. it was embarrassing lol. but yah. me and naomi sat on the floor in all the slow songs cuz we did not want guys to ask us to dance and then on the fast songs we screamed them. but really they need to play better music and NOT play techno. but yah. then on sunday i went to church, came home, and then watched law and order like all day lol. sundays are so relaxing lol. then today i woke up and pretty much did nothing all day except txt and chill. i helped with the laundry and cleaned the kitchen but taht was about it. i no i no my life is boring lol. but i was just in an amazing mood and i danced around like all day lol. and yah. it was kinda a weirdo day but watever lol. this is really long. i guess i better go. kinda no one is txting me back, its sad. but yah lol. sweet dreamz!!!

i lovers u a ton,

me <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

ps. on wednesday i am going to see the new will smith movie!!!!! im so excited!!!!!

Thursday June 26, 2008

today was the best day i had all week, no joke. i didnt have a panic attack or a breakdown or cry. well i did cry but only for like 5 minutes. today i didnt think hardly at all and that feels amazing. i woke up this moring and just hung out. then i had to go get shots. i had to get two, hepatitis a and the cancer one idk wat it is called. but yah. then we went and picked up nomi fry and she came over and hung out. we went to safeway and it was just amazing lol. i love that store and idk why. then we came home and my moms friend rosemary came over. she is pretty amaZZing lol. she is my "bff" lol. then we went swimming. we had so much fun. we just swam around and i saw my best friend paul and my "g" best friend trevor. but that kid hates me. but yah lol. and there was this kid with man boobs. he was like really skinny but he had boobs. rosemary said he needed to get a bra lol. i kinda had a laughing attack. she is hilarious. and then we took nomi and tori home. then we came back and yah. rosemary, aaron, wyatt, and cody came over and just hung out for a while. aaron is garretts coach and wyatt and cody are his kids. cody is my best friend to and he gave me a hug today. he is so cute. when i put some more pics on my blog i will put one of him. then i just blasted some music and now im working on my blog and IMing lulu. i better get to bed cuz i am kinda tired. hope u all had a freaken amaZZing day!!!!

hearts&hugs,
me

Wednesday June 25, 2008

hay everyone. i was signing in and it was showing all the blogs that have been updated and there was this one that said lesbian lovers... o wow lol. and omg i am so starving cuz i have not eaten since lunch. but i made myself a pot pie and it just came out and its burning my mouth but it is so yummy u have to try one lol. today i dont really no how to describe it, cuz my mood and feelings wood change so fast. one minute happy, one minute sad, one minute mad, one minute frustrated... just omg. i think i am bipolar or something. i kinda flipped out like a million times today. so this morning was alright. then trisha invited her friend kailee to yw tonite and i thought she hated me so i just started crying and was like omg. but kinda kailee is like my new best friend she is amazing lol. i love u kailee lol!!! but ya. then there is this thing that i cant tell anyone. but kinda some people already no and if u do then u no how much i am flipping out about it. it is like all i think about and its really sad but then kinda happy i guess to. i just idk yet. i need to make a pros and cons list... trisha that is ur job. and no its not a guy. i am done with guys. lol! but ya . so for mutual tonite i went ice blocking... omg it was so freaken AMAZING!!! lol!!! i had so much fun. i am so glad i went. but i wore shorts, that is not a good idea. for those of u who dont no wat ice blocking is well u take a huge block of ice and slide down a hill on it. it sounds stupid but pretty much its so much fun. it gives u an adreanaline rush... idk how to say or spell that word lol. so yah. it was just so much fun. but then i came home and i got in a huge fight with my parents bout that thing and yah. but i am better now. so there is one thing that i regret the most right now and that is ever going out with aaron. cuz if i never went out with him then he wood still be my friend and he wood be txting me right now and yah. he always new wat to say in watever kind of problem i was having. if he ever reads this which i doubt he will lol but i really miss ur advice so u should just txt me sometime cuz i have a million problems and i just miss talking to u. but yah i doubt he will ever even no that. i am not even finished eating my pot pie and i am full. something is wrong wit me i ate like half of it. yah. but i am just going to go to bed. well call trisha again and then go to bed. i hope u all had a freaken dazzling day!!! i love u all!!!

hearts&hugs,

me

Tuesday June 24, 2008

hey everyone. so pretty much i just changed me blog again. i added like a million amazing quotes and pictures. i think it looks amazing lol. i am really tired so this wont be very long. and i have to wake up early in the morning cuz i have to babysit, gay. but ya. so today was alright i guess. better than yesterday. i went swimming and i just let everything go, i didnt think at all. it feels amazing to not think. but ya. i have a new best friend named paul, he is on my brothers baseball team lol. but omg my "g" best friend trevor is so white, like no joke. i guess that doesnt make him "g" lol. but seriously like whiter than me and im white lol. that kid is not even my best friend cuz he hates me so ya. i think a lot of people hate me right not. kinda i have just been in an awful mood. cuz of one thing but i cant tell. but its really sad and some of u already know about it. but its depressing. well me and trisha are not fighting anymore. she is not the B word. but something is wrong with her cuz she is all sad and she wont tell me. she changes mood quickly. cuz earlier today she said her life was perfect. i guess u messed it up. well life isnt perfect. u have to read all my quotes and understnad. yah. but i think lulu is still mad at me. i was the B word to her last nite. but yah. she is kinda not having a good day. im sorry again lulu. i understand if u dont want to talk to me just txt me when u r ready to talk again. my life is depressing but i really want to be happy. thats why i put all those quotes on my blog so i can read them everyday. i hope taht my blog inspires everyone. i guess this was kinda long... sorry. sweet dreamz.

hearts&hugs,
me

ps. sorry again lulu, i really am. i feel terrible.
pss. trisha, u really need to get happy and stay happy. sorry for watever happened.
psss. nomi, if that thing does happen i will be really sad to. im crying. ugh, ah, omg!!!!!!

Monday June 23, 2008

hey everyone.. so my life sucks. i really want to cry. i the most horrible day ever and to top it all off i had a horrible night to. so it started this morning when i was in a terrible mood. i started yelling at everyone. then my mom got mad. then we were talking and then i started crying. and i just cried on her shoulder for like 2 hours. it was horrible. and i had a huge headache. finally when i was done i just went on the computer. i changed my blog and it looks amazing. but ya. so the main thing that ruined my hole freaken day was trisha. ah!!! i was just trying to be nice and then she was just being the B word. so i was going to invite her over after the movies and spend the night, so i asked her wat she was doing tomorro. she said amy was coming over tonite i was like ok nevermind. and then i was like dont txt me tonite and shes like why and i was like cuz ur going to be with amy and she said so and i said well i dont want to be rude. and then we got in this huge fight and so we are still fighting. cuz i dont no wat she told everyone tonite but both tyler and amy said i started the fight cuz i got mad cuz she invited amy and not me. that is not even the story. maybe people should just tell the truth. i think i am going to cry again. just ugh. everything in my life is not going right it keeps going wrong. things just keep getting worse. just omg. so ya i think i am just going to go to bed and think till i fall asleep. kinda i have a lot to think about. its hard to be strong when ur weak to begin with. its hard to be strong when nothing is right and everything is wrong. well i hope u all had a way better day than me...

hearts&hugs,
me

ps. sorry that this post is all over the place, but kinda i cant focus on anything.
pss. i dont think i am going to go to mutual wednesday or the dance. sorry guys.

TPing Photos

so these pics are from friday when i went TPing... they are amaZZing lol!!! everyone has to go TPing before they die, they just have to!!!

hearts&hugs,

me <3

Sunday June 22, 2008

so omg its been forever lol. well kinda not really only like i dont no lol. but ya. so on friday i went to lulus house. it was pretty fun but trisha was in a bad mood. i hung out with lulu and samme all night. i had so much fun. we went TPing lol, it was amazing. then we sat on her porch for like ever just talking about everything. it was nice to let everything out. i love there porch just cuz its amazing lol. then on saturday i went to look at puppys with them lol they were so cute. ah!!! but it was going to be a big dog so they didnt get it. then i came home. i was supposed to go mow lawns but i ended up not going cuz when i got home it was already too hot to go. so i lucked out. but i have to go sometime this week. which sucks. then i helped my dad wash the cars, it was fun lol. i got soaked and so did he lol. then my aunts came by and i squirted them down lol. it was hilarious lol. they told me not to take a shower till they got back cuz i was going to help them plant flowers so i didnt. the sun went down and it was freezing. i was still wet and i just went and laid on the couch and i fell asleep from 7:30 till like 9. i missed helping them plant flowers. but i was so cold and i could not even get warm. so then i went and laid on my mom and dads bed and watched a movie with my mom. then my dad went and bought me m&ms cuz he is amazing like that lol. then i took a shower and went to bed. but kinda i couldnt fall asleep. so i just laid there till like 2. and everyone fell asleep on me so i had no one to talk to which is sad. so i just laid there and was thinking. i thought about a lot of stuff which is kinda sad. i hate thinking its gay and it just ruins my whole life. well kinda not really. so then i fell asleep. then i wok up this morning and went to church. came home, ate dinner, and then watched tv like all day. it was amazing to not have to do anything lol. but ya. so i watched this really cute show called in plain sight. and they were in this shed thing and the guy, marshall, was shot. the girl, mary, was like why are u getting a new job i thought we were friends. he said we are friends. she said u r my only friend. he said ur my only friend. then they kissed!!! ah!!! omg lol!! it was so cute lol!!!! just like wow. it was so cute. so ya. i am thinking again and its gay. i want to cry!!!! but that wood be bad. so i wont. well i am going to bed to think some more i guess. well lotts of love!!!

hearts&hugs,
me <3

Thursday June 19, 2008

so i just realized that i think i put the wrong date on yesterdays post lol. that is gay of me lol. ya so pretty much i have a ton of stuff to tell, like get off my back. just like omg. so last night at mutual we played jeopardy and my team so won!! lol. but it was kinda like really boring. everything was so hard like all the questions. and i had to go against george who is really smart. he knows everything and ya i didnt even no the first question they were talking bout. but i got to see trisha last nite. she looks amazing lol. she has blonde hair again which is exciting. but she is going to chop off all her hair and most likely dye it again. it was fun to see her. but then i got home and my sister started crying like out of no where. i didnt no wat was wrong and she woodnt talk to me. then she told my mom and dad and i overheard some of it. she was mad at me for something, i dont really no wat for but ya. it kinda bothers me. but i dont no wat to say to her. so ya and she is not here tonite so i cant really talk to her. last nite i fell asleep on the couch with my contacts in. i was just thinking about a lot of stuff and crying a lot and i just fell asleep. so this morning i woke up at like 8. then i saw sister lewis cuz she came to see my mom and i just love her she can always make me smile. then i went over to nomis house. it was really fun. we watched transformers, my favorite movie ever. it was amazing. then we just hung out and talked. it was really relaxing for me. we went to target and i bought the we the kings cd, they are my new favorite band ever. they are amazing and i love all there songs. then i came home and got in the shower, i emailed lulu back and now i am posting a new post on my blog. pretty much i am not in a good mood right now and its making me sad. i am really confused about a lot. like trisha. i dont no wat is wrong with her. she doesnt seem like her self anymore. and me and her and smitty were supposed to get together tomorro and hang out but now she doesnt want to cuz she wants to spend time with her parents, she has never wanted to do that. like ever since i met her. she really makes me sad. but i am still going over to her house cuz lulu invited me over. we are going to watch camp rock, even tho i kinda dont even want to see that movie. but ya. i really want to go TPing with them and so i hope its fun. i hope trisha is in a better mood and that she will come with us. she just isnt herself... ugh. my life is gay. well not really but for this moment it is. i hope u all had an amazing day!!!

hearts&hugs,
me

Thursday June 18, 2008

hey guys!!! sorry i missed u yesterday i was having too much fun lol!!! and i got home late so i couldnt write on my blog. but ya lol. so yesterday i went over to lulu's house for like the hole day lol. i left at around 2 and got home like 12. it was amaZZing!!! lol!!! so ya. i just hung out all day with her. we went to the park and talked bout guys and some other stuff lol. we had a really great time. i have not seen lulu in forever so it was fun to just hang out together lol. we switched phone like all day. it was fun to have someone elses phone lol. then we went babysitting for sister lewis. she is hilarious lol!!! we watched the eye. omg it was so scary!!!!! ahh!!!! like u have no idea. so we decided to have a scary movie night!!! omg it will be amazing!!! some movies are prom night, one missed call, koojo, children of the corn, vaccant, the eye, hitchhiker, room 214, and a hole bunch of others lol. it will be amazing lol. so theres this part in the eye where she is looking out her door from that little eye hole thing. then this scary dark seeker thing that is on fire jumps out and i screamed lol. luckily i didnt wake the kids lol. it was funny. then after the movie we were just talking bout scary movies all night. i heart scary movies lol. and lulu is the only one that will watch them with me lol. but i cant wait to we watch scary movies all night lol. it will be amazzing lol!!! so ya. but yesterday i cut my bangs. i always cut them and they look fine. but they were really long so i cut them and i cut them to short, they look horrible. i look like a dog. its gay but i will just have to get used to them lol. they dont look that bad i guess but they wont go behing my ears and they keep getting in my face which bugs the crap out of me. but i bet if i wear my hair down i will look like an emo kid. so ya. i am so excited for tonite!!! cuz trisha is coming home!!!!! i cant wait!!! lol!! and we are playing jeopary with the guys so that should be fun. and the girls are totally going to kick the guys butts lol!!! ha ha ha!!! so ya!! i better go straighten my hair so then i will look like an emo kid lol!!! hope ur having an amaZZing day!! hearts u all!!!

lotts of hearts,
Me <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Monday June 16, 2008

so omg its been forever!!!! ah!!! i have missed my computer lol!!! so well utah was amazing lol. it felt so good to just get away from it all and not have to worry bout anything. like omg lol. i had fun just hanging out with my cousin and watching movies. by the way, my new fav movie is transformers lol!!! that movie is so freaken amazzing lol!!! so... for like christmas i so want it lol. to any of u who are willing to buy me my fav movie lol. jk jk jk. well when me and trisha have our will smith party we are so watching it cuz like no one has seen it. and everyone who hasnt seen it really needs to lol. but ya lol. so i made a lot of changes to my blog cuz it was gay and boring. but my most favorite thing is my music!!! its exciting to open my blog and have my fav songs start to play lol. so i have kinda not been thinking a lot lately which is good lol. well except when i have been driving and sitting in the car. i drove like a million hours it was so omg. my grandpa was telling me wat to do and i just wanted to smack him. he can be really annoying but he means good and i no that. i like being with my grandparents cuz they let me do watever i want and they respect me for me. which feels good. im listening to touch my body lol right now. i havent heard this song in forever lol!!! its pretty much amazing!!! lol. so since everyone thinks i am a flirt i no where i get it from. my uncle loyd. he is like a million lol but he was flirting with everyone and they were all family. lol. so thats where i get it lol. i am sorry to every guy that i ever flirted with i didnt really mean to it just happens. i dont even no why guys went out with me, i mean seriously. i look horrible and i am a freak lol. no joke lol. guys like aaron and michael omg wat were u thinking lol. seriously tho. so... ya. but i was just going to write something but then i forgot lol. its hard to put what im thinking about into words. its gay lol . so i did decide one very important thinng while i was gone. well actually two lol. the first one is that i do not care what people think of me anymore. i just dont. they can say anything they want and i wood want them to tell me face to face what they think of me but that doesnt always happen. but i am just not going to listen to wat they have to say cuz i like being me. so if u have anything to say to me leave me a comment and a name, first and last. unless ur for sure i no u lol then u dont have to put ur last name lol. but ya lol. so the second thing that i decieded is that omg i missed a ton of people lol and my music. omg if i moved i wood have to find a new favorite radio station lol. and i missed everyone so much even tho i was only gone for a week lol. if i moved i wood be lost without all my amazing friends!!! i just heart u guys!!! thanks for being amazing lol!!! so idk wat i am doing for the rest of the week lol hmmm... im bored. now im listening to switch lol. amazing!! so my friend brandon called me out of no where it was weird. he is one of my really good friends little brother and i havent talked to him in like 10 years. and the last time i talked to him he told me he was emo and he sent me a pic of his arm and then his face. he just looked really sad and not himself. it was sad. but when i talked to him today he seemed happy so that is good. im listening to crying out for me remix lol its way better than the regular version. lol. so for those of u i havent told, i have a new best friend. his name is gage and his is like my second cousin i think. lol he is 9 and the baby of a set of triplets. he is pretty amazing lol. he does bmx and was like the national chanpion or something idk lol but he does really good wheelies. and he just did them for me like all day lol. ooo and he lives in vegas, my fav place to be lol. so ya. well before i go i have to tell u one last thing , i am never going to get married. cuz well it wood be gay. and how could u like someone for like 50 years. wow lol. well i gots ta go. ttyl!!! hope u are all doing amazing!!!

lots of hearts,
Me <3

ps. woot woot lol

Thursday June 5, 2008

omg wow!!! it has been forever since i have updated my blog, and so mych has happened. but kinda i dont really remember it all lol. well idk even where i left off last time. well theres this guy who i like a lot a lot but i dont ever see him and he lost his cell phone, so its kinda depressing, but watever. if it was meant to be then i will see him soon. omg i have so much going on right now, im just so overwhelmed!!!!! well tonite my sister is having a movie party and all the beehives are coming over. but i invited nomi over cuz well i just love her lol. but ya. so we are going to just hang out and watch movies. and i think karoke after so that will be really fun lol, even tho i suck at singing!!!! but watever i dont care wat people think of me right now. pretty much i look like crap. cuz i am dying my hair tonite so i just took a shower but didnt really feel like getting around. so i am wearing some comfortable shorts, my "little miss naughty" shirt and some knee socks that smitty gave me. so i am eating some really good soup right now lol. i am kinda starving cuz i have not eaten anything since breakfast lol. but ya so where was i, um o ya this weekend. tomorro i am going to the movies. it was some guys brillian idea to invite a million people and guess what half of them are going to be gone, its gay!!! but watever i am still excited to go lol. we are going to go see indiana jones, i am so excited lol!!! i think it will be pretty fun i just hope i dont run into someone i hate. that wood kinda suck!!! but ya then on saturday idk wat i am doing probabley laundry and packing. and on sunday i am leaving forever!!!! i am moving!!! lol jk jk jk jk!!! i am not moving just going to utah for a week. my grandparents are taking me and i am so excited to get out of this gay town for a week!!!! yes!!! lol!!! so i have a dream right now... i want to make eye contact with the guy i like. cuz i have never really seen him in person well i have but we didnt talk. but i want to. but probabley that wont ever happen. well pretty much i gots to go cuz nomi is going to be here soon!!!! lol!!! i hope summer is going fantasticly amazing lol for everyone!!! lots of love!!!

LOv3,
Me <3