Wednesday July 30, 2008

hey everyone!!! sorry i have been so busy lately and have not had time to make a post. so much had happened and i dont even have time to explain it all. my dad has to get on the computer so i have like 5 minutes. i will try to get on here tomorro b4 i leave but idk. well thats basicly what i wanted to tell u all... i am leaving tomorro and not coming back till august 6. omg that is a long time lol. but i am going to durango and it will be a blast to just get away. pretty much i g2g!!! lovers u all!!!!\

me <3 <3 <3

Saturday July 26, 2008

hey people!!!! its almost been a week and so much has happened lol. well girls camp was freaken amaZZing lol!!!!!!! i had so much fun and i met so many new people lol. i swear every txt i get im like who is this and then they tell me and im like omg i so love u a ton lol!!! i got a million new numbers and just made a million new friends. this year girls camp kicked butt!!! i had awesome leaders and awesome ycls and just awesome everything lol. it felt good to come home tho and take a shower lol. it also felt good to sit in an air conditioned car lol. i got home yesterday. on the way home i went to 7-11 and got a slurpie and some nachos lol. it was so yummy!!! then for dinner my aunts got me french fries. lol it was delicious. as soon as i got service i checked my messeges and i had like 30. it was so amazing. i was like people love me lol. right now im listening to he said, she said... this song is nasty lol. wow lol. but pretty much yah. i got home and showed my mom all the stuff we had made and then we talked for awhile. then it started pouring rain. it is all cuz of that freaken rain doll i swear. (so we were getting ready to go on our hike and this creepy old guy brought us this doll and was like do u want it. and we were like uh sure. so we put it outside our camp. the guy said it was a rain doll and whenever u put it outside it rained. it rained everyday at camp) so yesterday it rained. the rain doll really works. but so me and my sister and my little brothers went and played in the rain. it was so much fun. we were soaking and just jumping in puddles and having so much fun. then i came inside and took like an hour shower. it felt so good. lol. then i unpacked, did my laundry, and watched a movie. my little brothers went to my aunts house and spent the nite and my sister went to bed really early. so i was awake and i went upstairs and laid on my parents bed. we were talking then i was laying by my dad and i fell asleep there. i slept with them and they didnt even wake me up. but anyways lol. this morning i woke up and my mom was like hurry up we are going out to breakfast. we went to ihop with my aunts and then we went shopping with them. i got a notebook that says "ROCKSTAR" its amazing lol. i also got some other school stuff. then i came home and have just been chillin. but pretty much last nite i didnt have my phone like at all. since i got back from girls camp i am not really used to it working. i forget bout it and then like 3 hours later i am like i better check my phone and have like 10 messeges. some people really need to calm down lol. but yah. so i got a call from an unknown number and i answered it. i heard people talking but not to me just like whispering in the backround so i hung up. then this morning i had a missed call from that one guy. i was so happy i was like ah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but yah. i havent talked to him in like a week so it is sad but then good to. its confusing and hard to explain. but yah. pretty much i am getting ready to leave. i am going to a dance with all my friends and its going to be amazing lol. and this week i am so busy. just omg. i have to finish my freaken summer homework. then on tuesday i am going to the movies with a million people to see the dark knight and its going to be so rockstar lol. then on thursday i am leaving again till August 6. i am going to durango. it will be amazing lol. well i better get going. hope u all had an amazing week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lov3 ya!!!!!!

lovers,
me <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

Sunday July 20, 2008

hey everyone! its kinda been forever again. but thats just the way i roll. well i am leaving tomorro and then u will never see me again... just kidding lol. i am coming back on friday. i am going to girls camp and it is going to be so freaken amazing i cant even wait!!!! i just get to hang out with all my friends for a week, its going to be amazing. getting away is just what i need right now. i found out that there is no service up where we are going so i am shutting off my phone when i get there and then not turing it on till we leave. i hope i have a million txts so u all better txt me lol. it wood be really sad if i only had like one or something. then i wood cry cuz everyone wood hate me. but yah. i am all packed and i took a shower tonite so i dont have to take one in the morning. i am going to straighten my hair and then i am leaving. its going to be kinda not fun the first day or the first half of the second day cuz i am going up a day early cuz i have to and then everyone else is coming up tuesday. its gay but whatever. i am really excited to go but then kinda not really cuz i got put in a group that i dont really like so it sucks. but if i get annoyed or something i am switching tents and screw what everyone else says. rachel is going to be the head leader at girls camp and she loves me so she will understand. but i am going to sneak out everynite and go to all the other tents and i could care less if i get in trouble cuz i am not really doing anything wrong. people just flip out so easily and they really need to calm down. but yah. i am just going to have a good attitude and be nice to everyone (even people i hate) and i hope that will make it an amazing week. but yah. so i have been doing nothing lately, just a lot of thinking and my gay freaken homework. but yah. thinking is the worst thing u could ever do for yourself and kinda thats like all i have been doing. but yesterday i was on the computer and i was only txting lulu and then i got a txt from the person i was thinking about and it made me smile lol. it was good :-) (i just made that smiley face lol). but yah then i bought a million songs and my sister bought all the mamma mia songs lol! omg!!!! that is my 3rd favorite movie ever!!!!!!!!! its so freaken amaZZing lol. i went with lulu and my sister and saw it on friday and it was just all exciting lol. pretty much i decided that dancing queen is my theme song lol. kinda i am just like that lady but i hope that doesnt happen to me. but pretty much yah. i better get to bed. i hope u all have a freaken amazing week and u do a million fun things!!!! LOv3 ya!!!!

lovers u all a ton,
me <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

ps. if u read this leave a comment so when i get back i will have something to read lol
pss. dont forget to txt me!!!!!

Wednesday July 16, 2008

its been awhile since i have talked to u all last. and last time i was having a freaken break down. kinda since then my life has still been pretty sucky. i just cant get happy. it makes me want to cry. today was just a horrible freaken day. after i got out of the shower my mom came in and started yelling at me. she was just going off on me. i wasnt really listening cuz i get the same lecture a lot. but yah. then she followed me into my room and was still yelling. she had started yelling because i was not doing my homework. i have gay freaken summer homework and i barely started. but its my life, my choices, not hers. but then she like changed the whole freaken conversation around on me. she was suddenly talking bout how i have changed and how everything is michaels fault and that maybe i should get away from my family and that i am not happy. well u dont think i already know all that. i cry almost everynite cuz i am not happy. i am not happy with my life. i dont like it. my life is close to nearly not perfect. i just want to get happy and stay happy but i cant. i have so much on my mind right now and talking only makes things worse for me. she just sat on my bed looking at me while i balled my freaken eyes out. she said that maybe i should go to colorado springs for the school year. she said that brighton high was not making me happy anymore. she said i could go live with her aunt and uncle for the school year. if i did go i would only want to go for one semester and then come back. cuz i wood miss so many people. i dont want to go cuz i wood miss so many things. like... seeing all my school friends, lulus amazing birthday party, homecoming (game, week, dance, royalty), nomis first high school dance, halloween, thanksgiving, all the football games, i woodnt be back till christmas. that is forever. i wood not see anyone for like 3 months of my whole freaken life. i wood miss TPing season and long walks at nite. i wood miss everything i love. and it wood totally and completelty be a new start, a new beginning. but i dont think i will end up going. unless my parents make me. they have been being all weird around me. its freaken gay. my freaken gay freaken life. well i better go to bed so i can get some sleep. sweet dreamz.

lovers u all a ton,
me

People!!!

ok so i no this is like the millionth post today but seriously. i am in such a bad mood. i may not seem like it when i talk to u but inside i dont no wats going on with me. ok so i shut off my phone at 1 since i am supposed to and then i turned it on at 4:30. i had 3 messeges. i was like o kew people love me. i had two from tyler and a pic from christian. he got his lip pierced and he sent me a pic. it looked pretty kew. i wrote back it looks amazing. then i told him that i wanted to pierce my belly button and then i get this really mean txt. its from aaron on christians phone and it says all this mean stuff like i am a slut and im so gross and to stop txting his friends and all this crap. well guess wat... he txt me first!!!!!!!! i was doin fine without aaron or christian or gage or michael or anyone in my life. but i deleted that number a while ago. then a couple weekends ago i got this weirdo txt from a number and it said something really nasty. it was gay. then they just called and then the next day i was txting christian and he told me that aaron had sent that messege and that gage hated me and aaron didnt. then i hadnt talked to him since. but then today aaron just says that and i was like wtf. are u freaken kidding me?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! people really need to stay out of my life. so for those of u out there that keep coming in and out of my life, make up your minds. either be in my life and be nice to me or be out. be out and stay out. dont ever come back. delete my number forever. geez!!! i kinda just had a breakout. i am kinda doing better now. but seriously. aaron, christian, gage, michael, whoever the heck i was txting just decide and then follow it. stay in or out.

Friday July 11, 2008

hey guys!!!!! its been forever since i actually made a real post lol. i put all my pics from montana on there but i havent really gotten to tell u all how i have been. well kinda my life has been boring and boring and boring lol. since i have gotten home i have had no motivation to do anything so i have been really really lazy. but yah i have been thinking like way too much, it really sucks. thinking is the worst thing you could do for yourself. i always have too much to think about and its so overwhelming. last nite i was thinking about so much. i was so stressed out. i got really sick and i had a huge mirgrain and i thought i was going to puke. i cant even explain it. pretty much school sucks. i have to do gay summer homework and i havent even started it and school is starting kinda soon. i have so much to do but i dont feel like doing it. so maybe i will just drop those classes. idk. but then some guys are just in my life and then not in my life and then in and then not and they really just need to make up there minds. seriously tho. i cant keep changing my feelings. its not working out well for me. i have to go to my brothers baseball game at 2 and then at 8 tonite i am babysitting for this lady at my dads work. there are going to be 7 kids and the oldest two oldest are 5. and the rest are babies. but the lady said they were rich and that they pay good... so that is good cuz i need the money. next week i already have like 3 dates with different people. not guys lol just friends. my friend tallis birthday so im taking her out, then nomi, and then me trisha and smitty. omg wow lol. kinda i have to go so ttyl!!!! have an amazing day!!!!

lovers u a ton,
me

Coming Home!!

if u cant already tell on the way home lulu had my camera. she took a million pics of herself lol. but she does look amaZZing lol!!!! on the way home we all slept most of the way. i was so worn out. but it was worth it lol!!!!

In Montana

these pictures are from when we were in montana. we had so much fun!!!! it was a blast. i took like a million more but my computer is too slow to let me put them all on there. so yah lol. but all the little kids are trishas cousins. they are so cute... and wild lol.

The Car Ride There

this pictures are of us driving there. omg it was a long ride lol. but it was fun. we pretty much just rocked out to some gay country music lol. we wrote notes to eachother. me and trisha had like 23 pages front and back. lol. that nite we read them... they were so hilarious. we had a laughing attack lol.