its been awhile since i have talked to u all last. and last time i was having a freaken break down. kinda since then my life has still been pretty sucky. i just cant get happy. it makes me want to cry. today was just a horrible freaken day. after i got out of the shower my mom came in and started yelling at me. she was just going off on me. i wasnt really listening cuz i get the same lecture a lot. but yah. then she followed me into my room and was still yelling. she had started yelling because i was not doing my homework. i have gay freaken summer homework and i barely started. but its my life, my choices, not hers. but then she like changed the whole freaken conversation around on me. she was suddenly talking bout how i have changed and how everything is michaels fault and that maybe i should get away from my family and that i am not happy. well u dont think i already know all that. i cry almost everynite cuz i am not happy. i am not happy with my life. i dont like it. my life is close to nearly not perfect. i just want to get happy and stay happy but i cant. i have so much on my mind right now and talking only makes things worse for me. she just sat on my bed looking at me while i balled my freaken eyes out. she said that maybe i should go to colorado springs for the school year. she said that brighton high was not making me happy anymore. she said i could go live with her aunt and uncle for the school year. if i did go i would only want to go for one semester and then come back. cuz i wood miss so many people. i dont want to go cuz i wood miss so many things. like... seeing all my school friends, lulus amazing birthday party, homecoming (game, week, dance, royalty), nomis first high school dance, halloween, thanksgiving, all the football games, i woodnt be back till christmas. that is forever. i wood not see anyone for like 3 months of my whole freaken life. i wood miss TPing season and long walks at nite. i wood miss everything i love. and it wood totally and completelty be a new start, a new beginning. but i dont think i will end up going. unless my parents make me. they have been being all weird around me. its freaken gay. my freaken gay freaken life. well i better go to bed so i can get some sleep. sweet dreamz.
lovers u all a ton,
me
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4 comments:
I'm sorry I hope that everything gets better!
i hope so too
sucora..........i think your mom is right about getting away for awhile.........i've learned it's not ppl that make your life sucky, it's yourself, and well i love you and i hope everything gets way better! i guess you just need to pick the right friends to hang out with. plz plz don't pierce your belly button!!!!!!!!!!!!! my aunt deb got her belly pierced and she did it by herself and ooze and blood came out and it got infected. sucora, plz plz dont. ignore all those ppl cuz they're making you making your life horrible. listen to you parents and TRUST me everything will get better if you ignore those ppl and make your life better. <3
sucora piercing your belly button is as dangerous as piercing next to your eye.....needles that are used to pierce can spread infection. piercing can't be sterilized unless you have a removable needle......you can get an infection in your stomach sucora if you do it by yourself. and the belly button ring gets caught on your clothing and do you want to deal with that? sucora, enjoy life ....and a belly button ring is just gonna make it miserable i love you and miss you when you go to colorado springs
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